


In Retrospect, it's Not That Bad.

by boppgoestheweasel



Series: the dadschlatt collection [7]
Category: Dream SMP - Fandom, Video Blogging RPF
Genre: DadSchlatt, Hurt/Comfort, I'm never sure, Kid Tubbo, Rated for cussing, Very domestic, but there's also angst so, just a chill fic, kid tommy, kinda??, maybe even a bit too chill idk, maybe even ooc?, no beta we die like men, tubbo's birthday, uncle quackity, yay!!
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-06
Updated: 2021-01-06
Packaged: 2021-03-14 07:35:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,460
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28541883
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/boppgoestheweasel/pseuds/boppgoestheweasel
Summary: It's Tubbo's fourth birthday, and Schlatt wants to make it as fun as possible.
Relationships: Alexis | Quackity & Jschlatt, Jschlatt & Toby Smith | Tubbo, Toby Smith | Tubbo & TommyInnit, no slashes here
Series: the dadschlatt collection [7]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2080011
Comments: 17
Kudos: 406





	In Retrospect, it's Not That Bad.

**Author's Note:**

> hello hello! this was another request from Lawhiteconchita!! <3 every time i get a request i ask myself how i hadn't thought of such things, because they're always so amazing!  
> do you have any requests? suggestions? leave them in the comments!
> 
> As always, I write these stories based off the characters portrayed in the SMP roleplay, and nothing else!! If any CCs mentioned in any of my content are uncomfortable with what I've written, then it will be deleted immediately.

Tubbo’s birthday.

It was Tubbo’s birthday. 

Schlatt had no idea how the day snuck up on him so fast. The kid was now turning four, and somehow he had someone to invite even when he had only gone to a daycare once when Schlatt went in for a job interview. 

Quackity had taken the kid, insisted that it would be good for him to make some friends. Schlatt wasn’t so sure, he didn’t want Tubbo to get a disease or something from the kids there. Quackity called bullshit and took Tubbo anyway. 

The daycare ended up being a good idea in the end. When Schlatt went to pick him up, the caretakers were incredibly friendly and the kids looked civil. One kid in particular had been playing with Tubbo the entire day- his name was Tommy. 

Tommy. The kid wore red- almost too much of it. His sweater was red, every damn band-aid on his arms and legs were either blue or red, including the one on the side of his chin. The boy looked like he went exploring a lot in dangerous places; Schlatt was a bit wary of him but Tubbo seemed to like him, in fact-

_ “Papa, can we have Tommy to my birthday?”  _

And that’s when Schlatt remembered that the day mentioned was just a week or so away.

He hadn’t really worried about it in the past- Tubbo wasn’t coherent enough since he was just an infant- but now he was turning four and he was starting to actually remember things. So he couldn’t just half-ass a birthday, no, he would have to try now, and you bet your ass he would. 

Yes, of course, he had said, nodding to Tommy. They appeared to be best friends, despite only knowing each other for a few hours. At least his son had a friend. 

_ “That’s great!”  _ Quackity was enthused when he heard about Tubbo’s new friend.  _ “Now the alleyway kids won’t have to come.” _

Now  _ that’s  _ where Schlatt was relieved. He didn’t want his kid to be with just him and Quackity; how fucking lame. He still wanted more people to be there; maybe Quackity’s mom would come? She was definitely family. 

Still, he felt terrible that Tubbo didn’t have many people to attend his party that was probably going to be shit. Schlatt didn’t know a single thing about preparing a party, but luckily Quackity was there to make it more bearable.

“Man- what the fuck is this?” 

It was three in the morning and Quackity had stayed over the night before so they could get up to prepare the party. Right now they were in the kitchen, and Quackity was pointing at what Schlatt called a cake. 

“It- that’s the fucking cake, Alex.” Schlatt retorted, wiping his hands on the pink apron that Quackity borrowed from his mother so that Schlatt could use it. 

“You call  _ this  _ a cake? J, it’s falling apart. Ripping at the seams. You didn’t even frost the whole thing!” Quackity kept his voice down.

“Jesus smart-ass, I ran out of frosting! Tubbo got into the damn cabinets and finger-scooped half of it into his mouth!”

“...you were gonna serve  _ licked frosting  _ to my  _ mother?”  _

Schlatt remained silent. He didn’t think about that.

“Well shit, let’s just buy one, then.” Schlatt looked around the kitchen for his wallet, but Quackity placed a hand on the man’s shoulder to stop him.

“I can just make one, but we are  _ not  _ serving this. Jesus Christ, man. I’m taking the car to the store. You stay here and hang up the streamers.” Quackity walked out of the kitchen, grabbing his coat. “Is that corner store open this early?”

“Hell fucking no. Someone’s always sleeping at the check-out counter. It’s weird. You’ll have to go to some other place.”

“Dammit, okay,” Quackity sighed, and then quietly left the house.

“Streamers…” Schlatt muttered, pulling the apron off of him after he dumped out the sad excuse of a cake. He never threw a party for someone else before- at least one that he was in charge of. He had the idea for a surprise party for Quackity’s 18th birthday, but one of their other friends at the time set it all up. So sue him, he had no idea how to make a cake. 

Schlatt went out to the living room to get the bag of party stuff he and Quackity bought when Tubbo went to sleep the night before. They’d been planning this from the day Tubbo mentioned it at the daycare, but they just bought the stuff recently so Tubbo wouldn’t accidentally stumble upon it. Inside the bag there were streamers, banners, and balloons that would be blown up and thrown to the floor. They wanted ones that floated, but neither of them knew where to get a helium tank. Floor balloons would have to do. All of this was minimal, it wasn’t going to be extravagant, but Tubbo was very easy to please, and Schlatt was determined to make it a good day. 

However all this supposed excitement wasn’t distracting him from the fact that he hadn’t been called in the last week about the job interview and whether he obtained the job or not. They said they would call him either way, but… his phone never rang. Sure, his job now was fine, but now that Tubbo was going to start going to school and the free daycare, Schlatt could start working during the day and getting more money. That way maybe Schlatt could afford to buy Tubbo some more fun things. But so far that was looking pretty damn bleak, considering no one was fucking calling him.

He sent Quackity a text to invite his mom, and then he got to work with the streamers. There were green, blue, red and yellow streamers. Pretty basic colors, but they were Tubbo’s favorite.

_ “Tommy loves red, may we get red, please?”  _

Tubbo talked about Tommy a  _ lot.  _ Which was fine, of course, considering Schlatt talked about Quackity all the time. Now they were even. 

Quackity came through the door and immediately ran into some streamers.

“Jesus- hey J! Got the ingredients and saw the text. She said she would come.” 

Schlatt stepped down from the chair he was standing on to hang up the decorations, the one he had just put up being the “Happy Birthday!” banner.

“Good, now we’ll have an official grandma at the party.”

“Oh cmon, Schlatt, you’re doing your best. There isn’t anyone else to invite,” Quackity said sincerely. “Tubbo’s gonna love it either way.”

“God, I fucking hope so. I nearly stapled my damn thumb off hanging up these flimsy pieces of paper.”

Quackity laughed, taking the things he bought into the kitchen.

“I hope you don’t mind, I got Tubbo something,” he said from the tiled room.

“What did you get him?” Schlatt was relocating the chair to put up the last banner.

“Just some clothes. He’s going to school soon, he needs more play clothes. You’ve seen the kid he plays with. Those two are going on adventures for sure.” Quackity hummed, putting on the apron. “Oh, and I picked up some Spanish learning flashcards that you can use with him. It’ll be a learning experience for the both of you.”

“Ha ha.” Schlatt rolled his eyes. “Uh- thanks though. At least he’ll have a present to open.” 

“Aw man don’t be like that. Maybe the red kid will get him a gift too. You know how it works.” 

“I was just hoping to get that damn job. Maybe I would’ve been able to get him that cool ass kid jeep at the store near your place.” Schlatt laughed. “Could you imagine? My ankles would be fucking gone.”

A laugh came from the kitchen while Quackity mixed the wet ingredients.

“Ah, what kid even needs a jeep? I think my mom said she was bringing some candy she found. It could be old as time, but I’m sure it won’t kill anyone.”

“I would sue your ass if my son died because you gave him some old candy.” Schlatt threw a roll of cardboard at the younger man.

“Hey hey! Watch the cake batter, you psychopath!” 

The man rolled his eyes and returned to the living room to look it over. The banners and streamers were all up; now all he had to do was the balloons.

“Hey, you’re gonna help me with the balloons, right? I can’t blow all these up by myself. There’s like- how many- six bags here. Good fuck.”

“What am I, a baker or a balloon-blower?” Quackity teased, loading the cake into the oven.

“That cake needs quite a few minutes to bake, okay? Just get in here and help me get these balloons around the house. It’s already 4:45.”

“Yeah yeah, I’ll be right there,” Quackity said as he washed his hands and removed the apron.

“When is your mom gonna be here?”

They were on the third bag of balloons and the cake was on the counter, cooling. The floor was partially covered in latex-free balloons, because god forbid that the kid coming over would be allergic to latex and they had latex balloons. Schlatt would be the worst party host/dad.

“Oh, maybe noon? Why?” Quackity tied off a balloon as he spoke.

“I think the kid is coming over at 1. I just kinda want her to be here so Tubbo’s friend doesn’t think a random lady walked in.”

“Why would he think that? It’s a party.”

“I don’t know! Maybe he would think she’s a late friend or some shit.” Schlatt threw a balloon over his shoulder.

Quackity laughed. “You are thinking about this  _ way  _ too much. It’s a four-year-old’s birthday party and  _ one  _ kid is coming over. It’s gonna be fine.”

“Ugh, I just don’t want it to be like any of my birthdays, yknow? He deserves better.” 

Quackity smiled at the notion that Tubbo deserved a good birthday. He knew he did, but hearing Schlatt say it was like music to his ears. To admit that he cared, even though Quackity could tell.

“What? Stop fucking staring at me! Take a damn picture, Alex.”

“No no, no I’m good.” Quackity went back to grabbing balloons. 

“I just don’t want him to grow up like me. Maybe if I had birthday parties and shit growing up I wouldn’t be fucked.”

“J, there were more factors than that, and you’re not even bad. You’re doing a great job, I think. I’m sure my mom will think so too.”

Schlatt sighed, a familiar lump rising to his throat, but he ignored it and swallowed it down. He cleared his throat.

“Jesus, they grow up so damn fast. Yknow? Seems like just yesterday I was handed the kid and told to piss off.” He changed the subject.

“Yeah, it’s pretty crazy,” Quackity laughed. “He’s still incredibly small, though.”

“What, did you expect him to be like, 5 feet by now? He’s only four,” Schlatt jabbed.

Quackity rolled his eyes, giving a chuckle. “I’m gonna go check on the cake.”

The cake was now frosted and decorated, and Schlatt had to admit that it looked pretty damn good. 

_ “Painting in high school really paid off, huh?” _

They put it in the fridge to cool, and continued with the fifth bag of balloons. It was starting to look really good in there- Schlatt’s bedding had been thrown in Tubbo’s room quietly and the house was incredibly clean. He and Quackity still had to get ready, but it was only almost 6AM, and the party didn’t technically start until everyone was there. Then again, he also knew he had to get everything done because Tubbo would be so excited, bouncing off the walls.

“Do you have any wrapping paper?” Quackity asked.

“You didn’t get a bag?” Schlatt asked.

“Cmon Schlatt, everyone knows that tearing open layers of paper is more fun than a fucking  _ bag.  _ A bag is something you give a gift to a teenager in. Not a kid.”

Schlatt grumbled and pointed to the small closet next to the front door. Quackity let out a snort and went to retrieve the wrapping paper. 

“Do you even know how to wrap shit?” Schlatt called, pouring himself some coffee.

“Um, well, I try my best.” 

“This is why bags are so much damn better, because there’s people like you who bring a present that looks like garbage to parties.”

“Shut up, shut up,” Quackity laughed, setting the items down at the table. 

The rest of the decorating went smoothly, considering all there was left was the balloons. Once that was done, Quackity and Schlatt got ready for the day, all without waking Tubbo up at all. When the kid did wake up, the both of them shouted “Happy Birthday!” to which Tubbo started screaming hysterically. Schlatt was sure the kid’s face hurt after smiling so wildly after seeing all the balloons and decorations. He had hugged both of them tightly, his effervescent laughter brightening the rooms of the house.

Noon rolled around, and sure enough, Quackity’s mom came pulling up to the house, coming to the door with a few small bags, filled with what could only be the candy Quackity mentioned earlier. She also had a small wrapped box, and a huge smile on her face. 

Schlatt was so happy to see the woman. She would come for holidays and birthdays, even his. She was just so great, and he was sure Quackity felt the same. When she came through the door, she greeted Schlatt and Quackity, asking where the kid was. Of course, they didn’t need to tell her, because the boy ran full speed out of his room just to hide behind Schlatt’s legs. They properly introduced him since he was older and hadn’t seen her for a while. 

Then around 1, Tommy showed up. Dear fucking god, Schlatt had never heard his kid scream so loud in his damn life. The kids hugged and Tommy was brought in; they immediately started throwing balloons at each other. Quackity laughed at Schlatt’s face- he forgot he had a  _ son.  _ And he and Alex knew very well what  _ two  _ of them were capable of. Tubbo was always so mellow by himself, there were never any issues necessarily. But fuck- two boys running around the house? 

But Tubbo was incredibly happy, and that’s all Schlatt wanted. 

He, Quackity and Quackity’s mom were talking at the table while the kids played in the living room. Music was playing, and it was just a great time.

“I’m so glad I fixed your cake, man. That looked terrible.” Quackity laughed, poking fun at the man sitting across from him.

“Hey, I tried, okay? It was also three in the fucking morning, leave me alone.” 

Suddenly, Schlatt’s phone rang, and he immediately stood up to take it. 

“I’ll be right back, I have to take this.” 

He stepped outside, and the cold air hit him like a truck. He should’ve grabbed his coat or  _ something.  _ It was so warm inside with all the people.

Schlatt pressed the button to accept the call, and he held the phone to his ear.

“Hello?” 

A woman’s voice responded, saying that she was calling him about the job interview he had gone to. He laughed- of course they would call when he least expected it.

He also started to laugh when the woman kindly said he didn’t get the job.

Schlatt said “thank you,” and promptly hung up. She seemed like she was about to say sorry, but he didn’t want to hear it, because she clearly was not. The wind was scarce and cold against his face that was starting to get patches of facial hair around his chin- finally. He was able to grow a mustache, but a beard was definitely missing.

He was unaware for how long he remained outside, because eventually he heard the door open and shut, and a familiar presence sat down next to him on the gravel, draping a coat over his shoulders.

“It’s cold as shit out here, Schlatt. Why don’t you come back in? Need some fresh air? I know it’s a bit crazy in there-”

“I didn’t get the job.” 

Quackity fell silent, clearing his throat.

“Oh. Oh, dammit, man. I’m sorry.” 

Schlatt felt sick. He just wanted to do something right for once, and this job was a step to overcoming his situation. Yeah, there were other jobs, but this one was  _ really  _ nice. He didn’t need a degree, and he would’ve been making bank. It wasn’t fucking fair.

“Hey uh, maybe I can get you a job at my workplace! I can butter my boss up and probably get you in without a degree.” Quackity set his hand on Schlatt’s shoulder.

_ Thanks, but no thanks.  _ Schlatt didn’t want to be seen as a charity case. He wanted to get a job that actually wanted and needed him. 

When Schlatt remained staring at the ground beneath them, Quackity spoke up.

“Don’t worry, man. You’ll get a job soon enough. There’s tons of places around that need new people! And even if not, none of it is your fault.”

“Yeah, I guess you’re right.” Schlatt pulled on his horns. He was so tired, so tired. 

They sat there in silence for a while more before Quackity stood up, offering a hand. 

“We should go inside before your kid thinks you died or something.” 

Schlatt laughed, taking Quackity’s hand and allowing himself to be lifted from the ground. They returned to the warmth of the house, and Schlatt put aside his worries so he could be there in the moment for once.

Later that day, after everyone had gone home and it was now just Tubbo and his dad, Schlatt was sitting on the couch, hunched over a glass of whiskey. His white shirt was free of the tie he had on, and his hair was no longer as nice as it used to be several hours ago. He took the night off to be with Tubbo, but the kid was nowhere to be seen, probably in his room hiding from the man. Schlatt wouldn’t blame him. Balloons still lofted at Schlatt’s ankles- there were a ton of them still despite the boys popping some during the day. He smirked, recalling how everytime one would explode, Quackity would jump. 

“Papa!” 

Schlatt was interrupted in his thinking when he heard his kid calling his name as he ran down the hall to the living room. He looked down at the glass in his hands and quickly placed it behind his feet. Bad move to be drinking right in the living room, bad move.

“I make this for you.” 

Schlatt was handed a piece of paper which had Tubbo and his friend Tommy scribbled on it, with supposed words as well, surrounding the picture. Behind the kids, there was a drawing of Schlatt, who had a wide smile on his face, and Quackity was next to him, smiling as well. 

“What does this say, bud?” Schlatt asked, pointing to the “words.”

“I say, ‘thank you!’ because my party was super fun. And Tommy saids it also!” Tubbo pressed the bee to Schlatt’s face- it was funny how the small child did such a thing. 

Schlatt was shocked. This kid  _ always  _ shocked him. He was always so happy with whatever Schlatt did, it was like he couldn’t do any wrong. He hoped the kid didn’t think that, because if so, he was bound to be disappointed one day. 

“You, uh- you really had fun?” Schlatt blinked.

“Yes! Yes I have fun,” Tubbo put his face to Schlatt’s arm. 

“You look tired, kid.” Schlatt laughed.

Tubbo hummed and sat on the couch next to Schlatt and leaned on him, further proving the man’s point.

“Well, let’s put on a movie. You get to choose because it’s your birthday.” Schlatt grabbed the remote from the coffee table and pointed it to the TV.

They were channel surfing for quite some time before the indecisive boy finally picked a movie.

Schlatt allowed himself to start thinking again as Tubbo watched the TV silently. Tubbo… had fun. He had a good birthday! He couldn’t take all the credit, though. If Quackity wasn’t there, the party would’ve been doomed. Even though Quackity was joking, that cake was the embodiment of hell. It looked like wet sand patched together to make the world’s shittiest sand castle. He laughed thinking about it. 

No, no he didn’t get the job he desperately needed, but that was okay, because Tubbo’s birthday wasn’t nearly as shit as he thought it would be. So in retrospect, it wasn’t at all that terrible. 

**Author's Note:**

> thank you for reading! have any requests/suggestions? dadschlatt headcanons? Leave them in the comments!! <3 <3 this was a bit of a longer one oml sorry


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